“Don’t Do Drugs” is what they told me. “Don’t Do Drugs” is what they thought. But no one ever mentioned alcohol, and it’s way worse than anyone imagined.”
Janey Lee Grace Badass & Sober 2018
If you’re like me, you’ve played a few video games in your life, and you’ve probably experienced what it’s like to fight a boss at the end of a mission. Whether you played Zelda as a kid or Borderlands as an adult, you know the Boss-Fight is never over the first time he dies. They are definitely attacking again and using some new powers in an attempt to defeat you. The boss will start spinning off darts or shooting lasers out of its eyes or, better yet, adding additional enemies to the battlefield while they reenergize for another round. Like the antagonist in a horror movie, no matter how hard you hit him/her/it, they always get back up, right when you think the movie is over.
Game designers give you time between rounds to load up on ammo, hide behind stuff and prepare your next strategy. There are YouTube channels devoted to teaching you how to defeat the bosses, and in many cases, I would have never finished and probably thrown up my hands and quit the game without them.
Like a boss fight, quitting alcohol is a battle of wills, changing strategies, and seeking help. When you think you have booze out of your life, it shows up with a new technique to get you addicted again. When you tell yourself you don’t like wine, the liquor industry comes up with a new sugary version of vodka that you cannot resist. Or your favorite celebrity produces some hard seltzer that you “must try… it’s delicious.”
When you go ten days without alcohol, your friend invites you to a party and insists that you have a drink in each hand. Like the boss-fight, booze has friends, liquor has sneaky weapons, and it takes time and study to beat.
But Dear Reader, stick with me through this short journey. I will do my best to teach you ways to beat the Booze Boss. I believe you already have the tools in your arsenal to win; you have to deploy a few simple changes in your strategy, hide behind some killer techniques, and load up your verbal weapons. With practice and patience, you will move on to the next level in your life. Being a badass is all about leveling up.
